How To Get Your Kids to Stay In Bed : Tips From a Quad Mom and Her Readers

I’ve said it before, I’ll say it again.

WE ARE SO STINKIN’ BLESSED WITH OUR FAMILY OF READERS!

I came to you discouraged, exhausted, and in tears and you came to the rescue.

Seriously, if you’re having any trouble with bedtime at your house, there’s some brainy, creative, and insightful ideas in the comment section of “Give Me a Magic Solution for Bedtime” post.

 

Here’s just a sampling of the ideas shared that might just work for your bedtime routine:

“We could give him 3 pennies for his nightstand and tell him he had to give us one each time he got up. Whatever he had leftover the next morning went into his piggybank.” – Heather

“We did a sticker chart for a while and if they got a sticker in the morning for being good at bedime, 10 or something meant a special adventure with mommy or daddy or grandma ALONE.” – Aimee

“Each night they went to bed well a new train car would appear on their wall after they were asleep. We just drew a new one on paper each night. They loved waking up to see a new train car - it took awhile - the train was pretty long but eventually they didn't need it anymore. To everything there is a season :)” - Fisher Family

“I used duct tape. It works for anything. And Amber and Adam are only slightly scarred emotionally. :)” - Belinda C (Facebook)

“We use the "Teach Me Time" clock with Brooke. You can set it to glow green at the hour that it is okay for them to get up.” – Andrea P (Facebook) (I found this clock on Amazon if you are interested, it' looks like a great find!) 

“We did timeouts in the PeaPod Tent; if they wouldn't stay in their beds. We set up the tents in a separate room from their bedroom and would remove the offender from the bedroom if they got out of bed. I usually didn't give them their blankie so that they would understand I was serious and it was time to go to bed and blankies are for bedtime in BED.” –Joy L (Facebook)

However, I truly believe that  EVERY child is different.  My own 4 being a prime example of this very phenomenon.  What works for one of them, by no means works for all of them. Our particular offender was not motivated by surprises, positive reinforcements, or verbal praise.  Likewise he did not respond well taking away toys, losing privileges, or punishment. 

So what do you turn to when neither positive nor negative reinforcement works?  NEUTRAL!

I remember watching the Stay in Bed Technique on Supernanny pre-quads. The days when I thought I was such a good mom (before I even had any kids)! Several of you mentioned that it had worked for you, and I was willing to try anything for a full nights sleep!

The basics behind the technique is you are not allowing your child to gain the attention (negative or positive) that they are seeking by getting out of bed.  You complete the normal bedtime routine (bathroom, prayers, drink, book, etc.) and then put them to bed. The first and second times they get up, you reinforce that it’s bedtime by telling them and leading them back to bed.  After the third escape you just keep leading them back to bed, without a word or cuddle.

I’m not going to lie to you.  THIS IS HARD WORK!  We had one persistent little dude who was bound and determined that his excuses would get his way. I couldn’t have done it without my Tag-Team-Buddy, Brad. Over 100 put downs later and over an hour of continuing to put him back in bed, he was FINALLY down for the night.

But here’s the best part: 

Our consistency has paid off! 

He’s been staying in his bed without getting up for 3 NIGHTS IN A ROW!!!!!!

I asked for a “Magic Solution”. 

And you didn’t let me down.

I.O.U.

Somebody Give Me the Magic Solution To Keep Kids in Bed for the Night

(Door Knob Opens)

“I need to go potty.”

(Back to Bed Tactics)

(Door Opens)

“My toe hurts.”

(Reluctant Back to Bed Tactics)

(Door Opens)

“I need a drink of water.”

Minutes Pass and I Think All Is FINALLY quiet for the night…

(Door Opens)

“I need my yellow dog.”

(Desperate Back to Bed Tactics)

(Door Opens)

“I need a drink.”

“There’s thunder in my room.”

“I need something.”

“I need a hug.”

___________ FILL IN THE BLANK WITH ANY EXCUSE IN THE BOOK!

(Minutes often turn into hours)

Yesterday I tweeted and FBed for ideas on how you keep your kid(s) in their bed. Some of them we’ve tried and others I’m willing to give a shot at.

Having Potty Trained Boys Has Wreaked Havoc On Our Bedtime Routine. We’ve tried SO MANY things and nothing is motivating 2 of our boys to stay in their beds at bedtime. Not even my teary pleas. Once they are asleep they stay in their beds, but our nights keep getting later and later. And we are getting weary.

The later their bedtimes get, the later we find ourselves going to bed – because we crave a little “down time”, and time to finish end of the day tasks.

We aren’t alone in this right?  I’m turning to you for a dose of encouragement, creative suggestions, and just your support. 

(I know in the grand scheme of things this has little value and it’s turned into more of a whine session than I intended.  Forgive me for that, and see me through this trying stage, could you please?)

I’ll compile a list of suggestions and maybe if we ALL put our brains together we can come up with the magic cure to keeping your kids in bed for the night. We’ll patent it, write books, go on tour, make T-shirts, make up a DVD series…

Think of all the frustration we’ll save parents for generations to come!

Yet Another Toddler Transition…

Can you guess what toddler transition were making now? 

Isaac and Henry have 2 new (used) toddler beds and as I write this I just heard their bedroom door open.  Double Trouble.

I’ll be right back….

 

So obviously we are working on the “transition” part during nap time, but over all it’s went well.

We are on the hunt for two more of these for Brooks and Clark.  (All of their cribs are literally falling apart.) Although I’ve threatened cribs until they were 14, it looks like our days of them sleeping in captivity security are numbered.

It’s a little sad to see them go. I remember collecting four cribs before the boys were born, not knowing if we would have the privilege of bringing home four babies alive.  The risks in our pregnancy were much too high to assemble four cribs prior to their delivery.

Even after they were home, we only had 2 cribs up for a long time, as Isaac and Henry and Brooks and Clark shared a crib.

 

 

Well after Isaac kicked Henry out of his crib, Brooks and Clark, the “wombmates” remained cribmates. Which kept our crib count at 3 well into the second year of their lives.

We have many many fond memories (click on each word for a link to a crib memory) of our boys in their cribs. It’s bittersweet parting.  

At least we have videos like this to look back on and treasure.

 

  

  

Q&A’s From the QuadParents: Part II

I could say more, but the video says A LOT (as in we like to ramble, and chat, and linger on, and slap our knees, while answering YOUR questions about our children).

So Without Further Ado, Part II… 

And if our answering questions created more questions (as is often the case), feel free to deposit your inquiry in our comment box. 

Or Just Tell Us How Truly Goofy We Are. 

Go Ahead.

You Know You Want To…. 

When It’s Time to Change, You’ve Got to Rearrange

Tell me you love the Brady Bunch half as much as I do! 

I grew up on afterschool Brady Bunch reruns, and I could probably beat any of you (minus my brother, but he’s probably not reading anyway) in a Brady Bunch Trivia showdown. 

If you’re not familiar with the Brady’s, “Here’s the Story” on this clip.  Greg wanted to make a “record” (it’s the prehistoric way people used to listen to music) with his 5 siblings. However, Peter's voice begins to change, so they had to improvise.

Peter Brady, we identify with you.  There’s been lots of CHANGING, REARRANGING, and IMPROVIZING in our lives lately!

The boys are settled in their new room that your valued input helped inspire.  The colors turned out so well!  We ended up using a handful of the storybook frames on the wall, and saving the rest for a future reading corner. There’s a few finishing touches to be made, but it’s functional! 

So did you notice there are a couple of cribs missing from this picture? 

Yep.  It’s true.  We separated them temporarily.  Change is hard, but often necessary. 

Our boys have sooooo much fun together in their cribs, but the “so much fun” turned into TOO MUCH FUN, in the form of a nap revolt for nearly a week.  I know that many kids stop taking naps around this age, but I’m not ready to throw in the towel just yet.  Besides, mamas know their own children, and I know that my boys NEED their mid-day naps on a regular basis.  Sometimes there are exceptions, and I’m thankful that there is some flexibility with this stage, but the week long absence led to a very difficult week of fighting, whining, disobedience, and discontentment. This left me stressed, worn down, and grumpy to say the least.

Needless to say, it was time for a change.  Our intention was to move all 4 boys into the freshly painted room, but this called for improvising.  Isaac and Henry moved over to the new digs (their cribs were the easiest to disassemble) and Clark and Brooks stayed put for now. When they outgrow the cribs, we hope to put them back together again.

My heart was sad to see them in two separate rooms for the first time since the NICU, but it’s fixed the nap issue. So the benefits are far outweighing the costs. Oh and it’s super precious to see them run into each others rooms in the morning to “wake" each other up.  They run, jump, wave, and scream like they haven’t seen each other in years!

So for now the “Bunch” will sleep 2 by 2, because….

When It’s Time to Change, You’ve Got to Rearrange!  

Sha Na Na Na, Na Na Na Na Na, Sha Na Na Na Na,

Love Those Wieder Girls!

NOW......

This post is long overdue...but still necessary. I CANNOT thank this family enough for the way they have loved our family from the preemie days to the present.

THEN...

This family was the glue that held us together during the ultimate sleep deprived first couple of months of the boys' lives, as they came over nearly Every Friday Night (what other teeenager gives up their Friday nights to sleep on the couch and feed babies??!!) and allowed us to shut off the alarm clock and get a full night's rest. It's honestly THE BEST gift you could offer a mother (and father) of multiples!!!!! Brad and I lived for Fridays those weeks....barely making it through those sleepless nights getting up for 1 1/2 - 2 hours to feed, then sleeping for 45 - 60 minutes before starting the routine all over again..... holding onto the promise that a goodnight's sleep was just around the corner.

We thought once the babies started sleeping through the night, they would disappear, but they have stuck with us like family and we are eternally grateful for their service to us!

I could go on and on...

The Wieder girls volunteered to take the boys for the day so we could move into our new digs (without trampling toddlers in the process). Allison (who recently became hooked to The Crew) took some great shots from their adventurous day that I wanted to post, but I couldn't do so extending a "public" heartfelt THANK YOU to the Wieder Fam: Tami, Allison, Kaitlin, and Jamie (& JK too)!

Allison and Her New Best Buddy Henry

Kaitlin and Clark

Jamie and Brooks

Tami and Isaac

My Favorites of The Boys thanks to Allison's Camera and Eye...

Takin' Up The Whole Swingset

Isaac Not Feeling So Hot, but Still Oh So Sweet

Henry Lovin' Life

Brooks Chillin' At The Swings

Clark Makin' His Way Through the Grass

PS Don't think you'll see too many more pictures of crawling Clark. He took 11+ steps at one time over the weekend! WAY TO GO, SUPERMAN!

Wombmates Remain Cribmates

Unbelievable. Yep, it's true. The Wombmates are still Cribmates. 14 Months Old Today and Clark and Brooks are still sharing their crib. (Isaac and Henry each sleep in their own cribs.) It just gets cuter all the time. Take a look:

14 Months is the longest we've ever heard of anyone co-bedding so we'll be giving Guinness a call to see if we can get in! (Kidding) Someday when you're flipping through the pages, looking at world records for the longest eyebrow hair, the most weddings attended by a best man, most coconuts smashed in one minute, or the world's tallest parsley plant there they'll be precious as precious can be....

If not the award for world's longest co-bedders perhaps the world's sweetest?????

To see our history of co-bedding quads go here.

Visions of Sugar-Plums...

"The children were nestled all snug in their beds,While visions of sugar-plums danced in their heads"

Clement Moore must have had this vision in his mind when he wrote "A Visit From St. Nicholas" or more commonly "Twas The Night Before Christmas". He's got a great middle name, he just spells it wrong -Clarke! There's some Christmas trivia for your next holiday party, courtesy of the quatro mama!

I can hardly believe these little "wombmates" are still "cribmates" at 10 1/2 months! They just love being together! People keep asking when we're going to separate them (Brooks and Clark) and I guess the answer is, "When it doesn't work anymore.". I mean, who could ask for more? - They sleep 12 hours at night, take good naps, and are just sooooo precious all curled up beside each other! After my post on co-bedding I had several comments and conversations with other moms of multiples about how they co-bedded until one day they started climbing on top of each other. Clark doesn't seem to mind....

So until it quits working, we'll savor these moments. Besides, it's one less crib sheet and mattress cover to change (one of my least favorite chores) and wash!

The Moment We've All Been Waiting For.......

Henry, you tell them....

"BABAH BAH BAH DAD DAAH DAH!"

That's right, Henry doesn't really speak English yet! Well, the news is we now have 3 cribs up in the nursery! HAHAAAA! Okay, so maybe it's not the BIG news you were anticipating, (and folks, I hope you aren't too disappointed when we reveal the real news, because you have come up with some very clever guesses) but it is BIG news in our house. We've been waiting for 8 months for this! Brad and I were able to take a field trip to BRU this weekend for a crib mattress. Then we had to play the "cram the crib" game, but I'm fairly pleased with the results. I guess I should tell you who got separated and why. Henry and Isaac are now proud owners of their very own cribs! Henry learned how to climb up and over the crib divider, thus waking his brother Isaac by plopping on top of him. Yep, it was time. Clark and Brooks continue to be cuddly and content together, so we'll refrain from cramming another crib into the room for now.

As for the teaser, I can't tell you just yet! I have to speak with some "insiders" before the secret can be revealed. Keep checking in, I've got a few more hints up my sleeve!

Babes in Dreamland

Thanks for all your comments/compliments on the co-bedding post. Many of you have told me how much you loved the picture of Brooks and Clark doing the synchronized thumb sucking. I'll answer a few FAQs that we've gotten from the recent posting....

1. Do the twins suck their thumbs often?
Yes, Clark and Brooks both suck their thumbs ALL the time. They even try to suck their thumbs and the bottle at the SAME time quite often. I know it's a terrible habit to break, but when you have 4 babies, if 2 of them learn to self-soothe by thumb sucking - yippee! Saves Brad or I a trip out of our cozy bed to find a pacifier in the dark for a crying baby in the middle of the night. We'll worry about breaking habits later, anyone know of a good orthodontist? HA!

2. Does anyone else suck their thumbs or take a pacifier?
Isaac is our only one who likes a pacifier much. He gets one when he goes to bed for the night and sometimes at church to keep his delightful squealing muffled a bit. Henry (and really all of them) suck their fingers and hands a lot, but I think that's do to all these TEETH! Clark has one through his gum and one on the way and it looks like Isaac's are just under the surface! Unreal! And in birth order, how about that? Official Tooth Count: 5

3. Do you own four cribs?
Yes, we do own 4 cribs, just have not put them up for space issues, and we have not bought the mattresses yet.

4. What are they wearing?
So glad you asked - one of my FAVORITE baby products out there. Perfect Shower Gift! They are called Sleepsacks. A bit pricey, but money well spent. These are made by Halo. They zip from top to bottom (so the zipper is at their feet instead of in their face) and are basically a wearable blanket that you don't have to worry about coming off in the middle of the night and waking them up. Also reduces the risks of SIDS. Genius!

AND......... because it just continues to be sooooooo precious. I had to post ONE more video of our sweet boys in their cribs. This one is so sweet it about brings me to tears. Makes me melt!

I will be posting some great cereal pictures soon - stay tuned, same great channel.
Until then, sweet dreams from Henry, Brooks, Clark, Isaac, Jen and Brad

Co-Bedding Quads

I remember bring the boys home and deciding to try co-bedding for both bonding and practical issues. Afterall, these boys shared a much tighter space in my tummy; they could share a crib for a while, right? It started off with Isaac and Brooks in the pack-n-play, since they were home first. Next it was Henry, Isaac, and Brooks in one crib. When Clark came home we started the 2 per crib system of Henry and Isaac in one crib and Brooks and Clark in the other. It has really worked out fabulously. I can't believe they've lasted this long. Most mothers of multiples who tried co-bedding told us that their babies only co-bedded for the first month or two before having to separate them. Our boys have exceeded our expectations.

Maybe it's just the mom in me wanting our boys to be close buddies, but I think they sleep better this way. Sure, there have been plenty of times that Brad and I have seperated the boys because someone has gotten to close, gotten kicked, pinched, spit-up on (thank goodness the days of projectile spit-up are over), but most of the time they sleep beautifully through their naps and the night. How can we complain when our babies have been sleeping over 10 hours at night for months now? I credit our schedule and our boys for their great sleeping habits, but sometimes I wonder if sleeping together helped them sleep through the night faster, since they accomplished this milestone at less than 2 month adjusted age.

I know that I'm days, weeks, surely not months away from seperating them into 4 cribs, but everytime I start thinking about how I'm going to fit 4 cribs into their room, I see their sweet sleeping little bodies and can hardly bare to think about it. Brooks and Clark almost always sleep cuddled up together. It's just a precious site. Lately, they've all been playing together in their cribs more. Almost every afternoon this week I've been able to peak around their doorway to catch them cracking each other up. Henry has been rocking back and forth on his knees, and apparently Isaac finds this hillarious. So until we HAVE to make their room into an orphanage-style nursery. I'm going to soak this up, cherish it, and take pictures to remember the sweetness of my babies sleeping together. Enjoy the pictures and video that I've captured in the last few days.

Henry and Isaac in crib #1

Clark and Brooks in Crib #2 (Can you tell they are identical?)

Catching You Up....

Alright, so where should I start?????? Let's just start with the boys and what they've been up to.....We have a doctor's appointment today, their 4 month appointment - can you believe it? 4 shots a piece for a grand total of 16 shots and 8 bandaides. Ouch! We will be Tylenoling (yes, it's now a verb) all night. There's a specific prayer request for ya! I'll try to get on and update you on weights. We look forward to that part!

Let's see....the boys are growing and are so much fun each day. Especially now that they are all smiling up a storm, it makes you feel like, "hey, he likes me". Everytime one of them smiles it makes my day over and over. What a blessing! They are sleeping about 9 hours on average a night, with an occasional pacifer run. Whoohooo! It was hard work, but it's now paying off. We are such better parents with a good nights sleep and we are so thankful for some real shut-eye! Their day consists of feedings every 3 hours, playtime, and naptime. They enjoy their bouncy seats, boppies, and gym mostly. Here's a short run down of what they are doing individually.

Henry: Henry has been showing that he still is the oldest by rolling over, (which is quite an accomplishment for a 2 month old (adjusted age)). He loves to do his trick in his bed, while he should be sleeping! Occasionally he rolls into his big brother Isaac, which he isn't too fond of, but we are keeping them in 2 cribs for as long as possible. The crib dividers maybe just around the corner, though. Henry smiles with his whole face - too cute. He has such a sweet personality.








This Henry right after he rolled over for the first time!



Brooks: Brooks continues to be laid back and go with the flow. He likes to smile most when you're feeding him, which is very cute, but a bit frustrating when you are trying to feed 4 babies! He's been figuring out how to bat at his toys and loves to look at his brothers. He curls up with Clark in the middle of the night - so cute!





Clark on the left, Brooks on the right. Yes, we really can tell them apart! Promise!








Clark: Clark loves to kick (this started way back in wombville). He was definately my most active one in there. He loves to hang upside down by kicking backwards in his boppie. He has a wonderful grin and is quite the happy boy when you wake him up from his nap. He has rolled over once in the boppie and once in his crib - we'll see if he keeps that up! He's also quite the cuddler.

Isaac: Isaac is the talker of the bunch. He makes noise from sleeping to waking. I'm thinking he might be immitating his cousin Jonathan. He loves to smile and coo at you while you talk to him. He just loves to eat! Isaac loves to be held and loved on.

Isaac showing off his big ole cheeks and no neck!




They each have their own personality, as you can see. Hope you enjoyed my little update.

More blogging later,
Quatro Mama and the Gang!